How Safe Is Your Heart From Attack? (Part III)

The food came and I dug into my cheesy, yummy nachos.

Chris ignored his cedar plank salmon steak and immediately went for the stuff arranged around the edges of his plate.

“What are you doing?” I asked, between gooey mouthfuls.

“Eating the vegetables before they get cold,” he said, scooping up piles of green and red stuff and putting them into his mouth.

My own mouth fell open. “Are you kidding me?! I always thought that stuff was just for decoration!”

True story.

That was a scene from one of my first dates with Chris, and a perfect example of how different we were as far as food choices went. It amazed me that anyone would willingly eat their veggies without a threat from mom about no dessert, or privileges being revoked.

Fast forward a quarter of a century. As I previously posted, the situation with our friend Noah inspired Chris and me to begin following the heart-smart South Beach Diet (SBD). It’s basically a low glycemic-index diet, which is a fancy way of saying “low sugar.”

The diet is organized into three phases. PHASE 1 lasts two weeks and has the greatest number of restrictions because it’s in that phase that your body learns to eliminate sugar cravings. PHASE 2 allows you to slowly add fruits and whole grains back into your diet (while still losing weight if you need to lose it). And PHASE 3 is never ending. But the author claims by that final phase it will be no big deal, and you’ll have simply adapted to the new way of eating.

As a self-confessed Sugar Monster, I was doubtful that this diet would really alter my life-long love affair with sugar. I mean, I love pastries, cakes, cookies, chocolate, you name it. I literally had a sweet treat every single day!

In PHASE 1, my biggest hurdle to overcome was my treasured morning Caramel Macchiato (twenty-two grams of sugar). I’m talking SUH-WEEEET, people!

In my attempts to create a replacement, I came up with some pretty horrid combinations of cocoa powder, fat-free cream, stevia, low-fat milk, unsweetened vanilla soy milk, powdered creamer, vanilla extract, almond extract, raspberry extract, …Aaarrrghh!

Nothing made me happy until I discovered this cool website: simplystevia.com. They sell all kinds of flavored stevia in liquid form. I finally engineered an adequate alternative combining flavored coffee beans, sugar-free vanilla caramel Coffee-Mate® and multiple drops of vanilla and toffee stevia. Yum!

Well, Chris and I have now completed 90 days of the SBD and the results are in. I have to say, I’m impressed!

First of all, Chris dropped about 25 pounds. And for me, it’s the weirdest thing! I look at sweet treats I normally crave, like the box of Belgian chocolates hubby bought for me on a recent trip to Europe, and…I …don’t…care. It’s so hard to even write that! I look at all that stuff and feel like I should want it, desire it, crave it. But those old lovin’ feelings just aren’t there. It’s not even particularly painful to pass the stuff up when I’m confronted with it.

Now, this doesn’t mean I’ll never eat those goodies again. Because, I mean, c’mon. God made desserts for a reason, right? And Dr. Agatston even acknowledges it’s fine to cheat on occasion. But for now, I’ll stay the path.

Other changes I’ve noticed are that I have more energy, and honestly, I feel like my brain function has even improved--less of that brain fog feeling. Chris just had a regular doc appointment, and although his cholesterol, blood sugar and blood pressure have always been in the normal range (just like Noah’s were!), his numbers are even better now. This is so encouraging since we’re both at risk for heart disease due to heredity factors. By being proactive this way, we’re hopefully altering our heart-health futures in a positive way.

I realized how much this diet had changed me when we went out to dinner the other night and our food arrived.

As we both dug into our side orders of fresh veggies, I said, “Who would’ve ever believed I’d be ordering steamed broccoli. On purpose!”

Chris just grinned at me and kept eating his own veggies before they got cold.

Would you try a diet if it promised to eliminate your cravings for sweets?

Image by: Mostafa Zamani

How Safe Is Your Heart From Attack? (Part II)

After the shock of what happened with our friend Noah, Chris and I took hard looks at our own genetic predispositions for heart disease. As I mentioned, both my parents have had bypass surgery, as well as Chris’s father. So we resolved to immediately begin eating in a more heart-healthy way.

Noah’s doctor recommended he read the The South BeachDiet by Arthur Agatston, M.D. I bought a copy and devoured it in only a couple of days (an amazing feat as I’m about the slowest reader on the planet). I found the information it contained really interesting!

I’d heard of the South Beach Diet (SBD) before, but since I’ve never been into what I perceived as “fad diets,” I hadn’t paid much attention to it. I figured it was some sort of body building trend for looking good on the beach. It seems I’m not the only one who had misconceptions about it. Many have mistakenly thought it was a low-carb, or low-fat, or even high-fat/high-protein diet.

None of these are accurate.

The diet’s creator, Dr. Agatston, is a cardiologist. He developed the diet back in 1995 specifically to help his cardiology patients improve their heart health. He lives in Southern Florida’s Miami Beach area (thus the diet’s name). After following his diet, his patients not only experienced, significant improvement in their blood chemistry and heart health, but they achieved phenomenal weight loss benefits as well. As a result, word quickly spread and the diet gained national attention.  

But bottom line, his diet started out all about the heart.

The SBD recalibrates the way your body responds to food, sugar in particular. You do this by going through the diet’s three phases, avoiding foods with a high glycemic index (high sugar!), and by:

1. Eating lean sources of protein (chicken, lean beef, fish, etc.)

2. Relying on “good” carbohydrates (vegetables, fruits and whole grains) and “good” fats (olive oil, canola oil and peanut oil)

3. Avoiding bad carbs and bad fats found in most processed foods like white bread and white rice, as well as pasta and potatoes.

Chris and I both wanted the heart health benefit, and he hoped to lose some weight, so we started the plan. For Chris, this diet wasn’t that much of a hardship. He’s a natural veggie lover. For me, on the other hand…well, I’m a sugar monster. I love dessert, donuts, pastries, chocolate. Oh mama, love me some chocolate! Ahem. Sorry, I digress. I figured if this diet actually removed my cravings for my beloved foods, well, that would be all right. I was doubtful, but decided to give it a try. I’ll post our progress periodically on the blog here.

In the meantime, through my SBD reading I discovered some unexpected foodie facts. I thought I’d share five of them with you today.

Five Heart Health Facts You Probably Never Heard Before

1. Starches such as white bread and white potatoes increase blood sugar levels faster than table sugar does. In fact eating a slice of white bread is worse for you than eating ice cream!

2. Immediately after eating a meal high in saturated fat, your arteries become predisposed to constriction and clotting. In essence, if the circumstances are right (or more accurately, wrong!) eating a high-saturated fat meal can actually trigger a heart attack.

3. Instant oatmeal is not a good choice! It’s too processed and thus has less fiber and more bad carbs. If you love oatmeal (Chris does, although I could never understand this), choose the slow-cooking kind and steel cut is the best.

4. Beer is not a good choice either! It’s made from maltose (maltodextrins), this sugar form increases blood sugar faster than any other type.

5. Most people who suffer heart attacks have average cholesterol levels! (It’s your ratio of LDL to HDL that plays a much more significant role.)

Have you ever tried the South Beach Diet? When thinking about your own health, how important do you think it is to pay attention to heredity?

Image by: Mostafa Zamani

How Safe Is Your Heart From Attack?

You may have noticed how much I whined about my hubby and I becoming dreaded Empty Nesters. Well, only two days after abandoning delivering Joshua to his new college dorm room, something happened which made our Empty Nester concerns pale in comparison.

Someone very dear us discovered he needed to have heart surgery, and his story impacted us in a profound way.

It all started a few months ago, when our friend Noah* began noticing his heart racing faster than normal when he ran, a short time later, he began having chest pain. He made an appointment with his regular doc, who did all his blood work and some standard tests.

He’s 49 years old. And his results for blood sugar, cholesterol levels, blood pressure, triglycerides, were all good. His thyroid was fine. He doesn’t smoke, and he’s not obese. His allergies had been flaring up, so the doc suggested that might be the cause and sent him to an allergist. More tests. More good results. But they gave him some allergy medicine and sent him home.

But he was still experiencing chest pain, so his original doc referred him to a cardiologist. This doc ran the standard battery of tests: EKG, stress test (Noah loved bragging about how he scored in the top 85% for his age group!). Again, all good. The cardiologist told him he was fine and sent him home.

NOBODY thought it was his heart.

Except Noah.

He refused to listen to the experts. On his own he "Googled" one of his area’s top local cardiologists and scheduled himself an appointment. When he met with this doctor, even he didn’t think it was Noah’s heart. But he scheduled him for a test called an Electron Beam Computed Tomography (EBCT). It’s a test where they take a three-dimensional, super fast--as in within one heartbeat-- picture of the entire heart and surrounding blood vessels.

It's an extremely accurate test, and it shows everything.

They discovered blockage.

Three days later Noah underwent surgery. (I refuse to call it a procedure! Have you noticed how everything is a “procedure” now? I say, if they’re cutting into your body, it’s surgery! But, I digress.)

The surgeon performed a catheterization which resulted in a stent being placed into one of Noah’s diagonal LAD arteries. Later, the surgeon told him that the vein they put the stent in was 99.9% blocked! He was so close to having a heart attack that it chills me!

I THANK GOD Noah refused to listen to all the experts, choosing to listen to his instincts instead.

Noah had none of the typical risk factors for heart disease, except one. His father had a heart attack in his early forties.

I am shocked at what a significant role heredity plays in our health as opposed to the traditional health issues science usually likes to blame. Both of my parents and my hubby’s father have had bypass surgeries. Noah’s experience was a wake-up call to us. Just because we aren’t experiencing any symptoms at the moment, doesn’t mean we have the slightest clue what is happening within our arteries at this very moment. I have now devoured a book on heart healthy eating habits which we will be practicing from this day forward. And I’ll be blogging about our journey over the some of my next posts.

*Pseudonym

If you had been in Noah’s shoes, would you have trusted the “experts,” or followed your instincts?

Image by: Seyed Mostafa Zamani

Ingenious Advertising!

My hubby received this in an email, and I literally laughed out loud when I saw it. I did a little web surfing and discovered the ad was a real one; it was covered in the July 17, 2012 edition of ADWEEK. Turns out it is a legitimate advertising campaign designed to sell Colgate dental floss. Ingenious and hilarious!

If you haven’t already seen this, check it out! I’ll wait while you take a leisurely scroll through the following three photos…

Now that you’ve had a chance to look them over…

In the first one you will now notice that the lady has an extra finger on her hand. In the second one we have an extra arm resting on the man’s shoulder, and in the last one the man is missing an ear!

So what do you think? Did the ad successfully prove that having food stuck in your teeth draws more attention than any physical defect?

Worked for me!

Link via: Ads of the World

Ladies...Go Red!

(I'm certain the above candy hearts are dark chocolate.)

 My sister-in-law sent me this video and I thought it was fitting to share it with you all today, the final day of the American Heart Association's February "Go Red For Women" campaign.

As some of you regular readers know, my mother suffered a heart attack a few months ago. Heart disease is serious stuff! So I wasn't sure how they were going to make a short, FUNNY video promoting heart awareness among women, but they did.

I'm sure every mom out there will relate to this. Check it out!

Take care of your heart!

Image by: Muffett

And So It Begins…

It was quiet.

Too quiet.

I couldn’t take it anymore!

Chris had been gone for a week and the loneliness sort of snuck up on me. I’d been putting in long hours on a writing project with a tight deadline. On Saturday evening, I rose to the surface, looked around, and realized I was alone. My social butterfly son Josh--who normally is happy to oblige me when I encourage him to invite friends over--just happened to have been gone two nights in a row. In general, I don’t mind alone time. I even enjoy it. But two full days was too much. I needed people!

People Who Need People

The following day was Superbowl Sunday. Josh was invited to a Superbowl Party and the hosting boy’s parents happened to be some of my favorite people. In a bold move I invited myself over. My darling friends not only gracefully agreed, but were kind enough to let me in the door after I admitted that I didn’t even know who was playing. (I know, I know--I’m un-American!) I do love the commercials, though. Here are two of my favorites!

"Space Babies" 2014 Kia Sorento Big Game Ad

Viva Young - 2013 Taco Bell Game Day Commercial

I ended up having a blast! As I drove home after the game, though, it occurred to me that this is my future. The loneliness I experienced while Chris was gone was a small taste of what I have to look forward to in a mere six months when our baby boy starts college in the fall. I’m dreading our upcoming status as full-fledged Empty Nesters (EN). Part of the problem is, as a freelance writer I work from my home. Alone. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE, LOVE my job, but it’s not like I can mosey down the hall for a chat with the person in the next office. When my hubby travels, will I turn into one of those people who leaves the TV on for company? Will my one-sided conversations with the dog become the norm?

Another thing is, I genuinely love the hubbub of having teens in the house. I adore when Josh’s friends are over talking, laughing, eating cookies, making noise and staying up too late. I’m going to have to make some serious adjustments. Push myself to reach out more--as I did on Superbowl Sunday. I’ve been assured by many ENs that there are benefits to the EN lifestyle. Like when I asked an EN couple at the Superbowl Party if they had any difficulty adjusting, they both shouted “NO!” at the same time. Hilarious!

Other people I’ve talked to acknowledge that while it’s hard at first--long weeknights with no games/concerts/conferences to attend--they swear that after that initial adjustment period there are loads of benefits, like: getting to know your spouse again, less laundry, cleaner house, and especially no more high-school-early alarm clocks. Plus, there will be time to pursue interests that were put on hold. Hmm…maybe I’ll join a book club, or learn to play an instrument. (Anybody have a nice, noisy drum set I can borrow?)

One EN friend pointed out that the bottom line is we’re sending our kids out into the world, and that’s what we raised them for. We’re doing our job, and that’s a good thing. But it’s still a little scary.

Any Empty Nesters out there with tips or advice for me?

Image by: Muffet

Chocolate is GOOD for you!

Lately, I’ve been working on some health, fitness and nutrition pieces for a client, and what with it being Valentine’s Day and all, I thought I would share some recent discoveries I’ve stumbled upon. Chocolate-related discoveries. I present to you, seven, count ‘em, SEVEN health benefits you get from eating chocolate. (They’re from legit sources and everything!)

• Chocolate is heart healthy! Studies show cocoa may reduce risk of heart disease.

• Some research has linked chocolate consumption to reduced instances of diabetes, stroke and heart attack.

• It helps lower blood pressure and improves vascular function.

• Chocolate has been linked with improved cholesterol levels.

• Chocolate boosts your mood! Chocolate makes us feel good.(Like we needed research to support this one! Clearly if it reverses the effects of Dementors, it's got to be powerful stuff.)

• Chocolate makes you smarter. Seriously! A study published in the Journal of Nutrition says so. See, chocolate has flavonoids. And flavonoids have been linked to increased brain functioning.

• And this one is a real winner. Researchers from the University of California, San Diego, reported in the Archives of InternalMedicine, that people who eat chocolate regularly tend to be thinner than those who never or very rarely consume chocolate. Is this cool or what?!

You’re welcome. Happy Valentine’s Day.

Now go eat some chocolate!

Disclaimer #1: The majority of the good stuff is most prevalent in dark chocolate (65 percent cocoa content and higher), than either milk or white. But hey, it’s chocolate, right?

Disclaimer #2: Chocoholics should still try to control themselves. Doctors remind us that it's important to keep a balanced diet and that all this cool research doesn't necessarily mean people should start downing daily bars of chocolate. Yaddah, yaddah, yaddah.

Disclaimer #3: I’m not a nutrition expert! I merely play one on this blog, particularly when it comes to the subject of chocolate.

Indulge at your own risk.

Image by 1la

The Phone Call

I’d like to apologize for my lack of “real” blogging over the past month. I know I’ve had periods in the past where my blogging has been a bit lame, but I don’t believe I’ve ever gone this long with only “Quote of the Month” posts to share.

I do have an excuse, though. It’s a good one. And it goes like this:

One morning in early October our phone rang at 5:50 a.m. My hubby’s alarm went off at the same time, so in our confusion we didn’t realize the phone was ringing and missed the call. Dialing into our voicemail we heard the following message:

“Hi Holly & Chris, this is Ruth-Mom. I’m calling to see if Holly can come over to let the dog out this morning?”

Huh?

“By the way, I’m having chest pain and we just called 9-1-1, so we’re expecting an ambulance any time now.”

Really, mom? REALLY?! That’s how you let us know you’re having a HEART ATTACK!

Long story short, my mom ended up spending 21 days in the hospital.

She didn’t enjoy it.

She had a catheterization, some lovely complications, a triple bypass, some more lovely complications including them sticking a tube up her nose for nutritional purposes.

She didn’t enjoy that either.

Finally, she was given the A-ok to go…

To Rehab.

She didn’t enjoy that either.

She was in rehab for a little over a week when she tried to escape. Seems they wanted to move her to a new room. She didn’t want to move to a new room. She wanted to go home. They insisted she stay. When I got there I found her in her new room eating dinner in a huff. She told me she was so mad she walked “ALL THE WAY ACROSS THE HALL!” This was a record.

She stayed the night, but scammed negotiated her release within two days.

She’s finally home. Tired but happier.

Needless to say, my writing life (& especially my blogging life!) has suffered. I’m going to try really hard to get back into my regular ol’ blogging groove, but with the holidays coming, I know I'm in for a real challenge. Right now, I wish I was one of those really cool bloggers who plans ahead and writes posts months in advance. Alas, *sigh*, that’s not me. Yet!

Image by: Ju-x

Five Tips for Marital Bliss

Today is my hubby’s and my 26^th Wedding Anniversary! I was going to write a short post sharing some of the wisdom I’ve gained on maintaining marital bliss for over a quarter of a century, but I stumbled upon this video and I cannot even begin to compete with the hysterical advice of Selma and Kenny! Married 72 years, they created this short video sharing their five tips for a happy marriage with their about-to-be-married grandson.

I PROMISE you this video is worth the entire four minutes to watch. But even if you can only hang around for two, do it. I was cracking up! And now, I give you…

Selma & Kenny

Do’s & Don’ts for Parents of a College Freshman

I know for some parents, this commercial rings true. But we just sent our oldest off to start her third year of college last weekend, and as happens every year since she was a freshman, I’m feeling a little blue.

Of course, I’m not nearly as bad as I was her first year away. Freshman year was the WORST! Oh mama, was I ever a basket case! Older wiser parents assured me it would get better, but I didn’t believe them. How could this gaping hole in my heart ever go away? Surely, I would never be happy again.

But, believe it or not, those older, wiser parents were right. It did get better. Eventually. So, I figured maybe I’d share a few of my suggested “DO’s” and “DON’Ts” for those parents who have just, or are about to, deposit their firstborn into the college life and are now trying to adjust to daily life without them. Sooo, here goes…

DO appreciate how clean and lovely her bedroom looks and REMAINS when she’s not currently living in it.

DON’T dwell on how much you miss him. Get out. Have lunch with friends. Try something new. Laugh.

DO come up with little personal touches to let her know you’re thinking about her. Send random videos of the family dog doing something that always makes her smile. Figure out creative long-distance ways to share inside family jokes. Send care packages or good old-fashioned letters.

DON’T text him every five minutes to see how things are going. Try to hold off until at least every ten.

DO be prepared to participate in in-depth conversations at 12:30 a.m. on the one night you’re so exhausted you were planning to go to bed early. Even though she’s having fun on her new college adventure, there will still be those moments when she needs your comfort or advice—and she’ll need it NOW.

And whatever you do, DON’T listen to Owl City’s Vanilla Twilight! I know this is supposed to be a simple love song, but I it fits perfectly for a parent/child relationship as well. I know it’s tempting to click that play button down there, but step away from the blog. (If you simply can’t resist, however, make sure you have some tissues nearby.)

You will survive!

Your Unrecognized Awesomeness

So, my lovely author and blogging e-friend (yes, I just made that word up!) Heidi Willis recently wrote a post about this book titled, You Are Good at Things: A Checklist by Andy Selsberg. The author makes readers aware that we are all most likely suffering from “unrecognized awesomeness”! For example, perhaps…

* You have the uncanny ability to always notice when someone has gotten a new haircut.

* You can make the last half-ounce of toothpaste last for a month.

* You are an expert at remote controlling, or…

* You're a wizard at resisting the urge to eat all the cheese right after grating it.

According to this quirky book’s description, it offers “a celebration of all your secret skills and unheralded abilities. It calls attention to the way you're able to give your kids names that will never appear on key chains at gift shops, and cheers your talent for wrapping presents using very little tape. In your own way, you're a master, and the world should know it. Because let's face it: You are good at things!”

I was cracking up at the things Heidi and her commenters acknowledged they were good at, and thought to myself, “What the heck, my blog friends and I are good at stuff, too.”

So I’m totally ripping off her blog post topic!

For the record, I’d like to give Heidi full credit for the idea and encourage you all to visit her blog: And Also...because there's always something else to say. I truly enjoy her posts! And while I’m at it, I’ll give her terrific book another plug. Some Kind of Normal is a great read. If you haven’t bought it already, get it—it’s wonderful!

And now, let’s all share some things we’re good at. I’ll go first:

*  I’m good at stealing other people’s blog ideas and using them on my blog!

*  I’m good at reading manuals.

*  I’m gifted at not dusting.

*   I’m great at making dinners that cause the smoke alarm to go off.

*   I have a talent for staying up way too late every night. 

*   I’m good at having two-way conversations with my dog.

*   I’m good at interrupting people’s stories to ask questions and get more details.

*   I’m terrific at freaking out in crisis situations.

*   I’m amazingly good at procrastinating.

*   I’m wonderful at embarrassing my kids in public.

*   I’m good at making character voices when reading a story aloud.

My daughter told me I had to write this one:

*  I’m great at getting overly emotional about animals getting injured on film and in real life.

Okay, your turn!

Selective Attention

I’m currently deep in research for an article I’m working on and in my research I came across this fascinating video. At least I found it fascinating! I challenge you all to give it a try--it’s super short, only a little over a minute-- then post a comment to let me know how you did!

Spring Break

My blogging schedule always seems to revolve around my children’s school schedule. And we are officially on Spring Break. Woo hoo! Here we are in Bora Bora, French Polynesia. I just slipped out of my hammock for a sec to grab myself a cool refreshing drink from the outdoor café and…

Okay, okay, I’m just kidding. I swiped this awesome photograph from a website I know nothing about but stumbled across because of its beautiful tropical images. You know when you’re stressed out and people tell you to go to your “Happy Place”? Well, right now this is mine! On previous spring and summer breaks, I’ve taken you gallivanting with us to Rome, Paris, Hawaii and more on this blog. But this year we are enjoying a simple “stay-cation.” I’ll be back in a couple of weeks.

Happy Easter, everyone!

Image Credit

The Real Way to Handle Stress

I poked at the baked chicken and broccoli on my dinner plate and sighed. “I’m not really hungry.”

“Why not?” Josh forked in another mouthful, chewing industriously.

“Uh…I think I ate too much earlier,” I mumbled.

He arched a brow. “Moooom? Were you stress eating again?”

I arched a brow right back at him and getting up from the dinner table, walked over to his homework spot to point out the towering pile of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup wrappers.

“Yeah, well…” At least he had the grace to look sheepish.

My son and I were both under a lot of pressure last week. He had high school finals to contend with, and I had a writing project with a tight deadline. Unfortunately, even after years of careful parenting, I’ve managed to pass my terrible stress-eating habit onto my boy. We both chowed down on junk food with abandon.

The thing is, I know it’s not healthy. I think every stress eater knows it’s not healthy. So why do we do it? Why does our body crave stuff that’s not good for us whenever we’re under pressure?

I “Googled” the topic and discovered one reason may be because under stress, our body produces extra cortisol, a.k.a. “the stress hormone.” And cortisol causes cravings for sweet and salty food, a.k.a. “junk food.” In the olden days, cortisol served a purpose, helping people bulk up on food to sustain them through times of scarcity. However, here in the suburban Midwest, where food is rarely scarce, we simply bulk up. Period.

Another reason we may stress eat is simply nervous energy. Some people bite their nails or grind their teeth. And some people eschew the unopened bag of baked tortilla chips and instead munch on Cheetos, or endless strands of Twizzlers, or uh…stuff like that, maybe.

Then I Googled, “healthy ways to deal with stress,” and found a bunch of common sense advice from experts. After contemplating it all, I thought, Really? And came up with my own, more practical advice (at least I think it’s more practical):

EXPERT TIP #1: EXERCISE.

My advice: FUGGEDABOUT IT.
I actually enjoy exercising, but now isn’t the time! (Okay, maybe squeeze in a few daily stretches to stay loose.)

EXPERT TIP #2: AVOID CAFFEINE AND SUGAR; EAT HEALTHY, BALANCED MEALS.

My advice: NOT. HAPPENING!
My daughter’s away at college and my boy is 17 years old. They both know a healthy diet includes fresh fruits and vegetables, lean meats, and high-grain breads. I’ve done my job. So if I choose to eat three Snickers Bars for dinner one night, what’s the big deal? The key is, don’t force yourself to eat the healthy food on top of it. And voilá! Weight gain successfully avoided! But DO load up on vitamins! This helps counteract the effect of all the unhealthy eating. And as far as caffeine, I say drink up! This counteracts the sugar crash you’re sure to experience from ingesting all the junk food and keeps you going well into the wee hours.

EXPERT TIP #3: RELAX: GET PLENTY OF SLEEP, TAKE LONG BATHS WITH SCENTED CANDLES, GET A MASSAGE, CALL A FRIEND, OR CURL UP WITH A GOOD BOOK.

My advice: SERIOUSLY. NOT HAPPENING!
C’mon! One of the big reasons we’re stressed is because we don’t have enough time to do what needs to be done. So how are we supposed to fit in all this great stress-relieving stuff?! You can do all those things when the crisis is over. Think of them as rewards for a stressful situation well handled.

Disclaimer: I am NOT a medical expert, I’m only playing one on this blog. This advice is purely for entertainment purposes and any similarity to real advice is a bizarre coincidence.

So how do you handle stress? Any healthy tips?

Twenty Something

The other day, my son told me a story which he found most amusing. An acquaintance of his turned eighteen. Amidst birthday congrats posted on her Facebook page from various friends, her mother added the comment, “Woo Hoo! I’m free! I’m free!”

I laughed out loud along with him, then I commented, “But you know, we’re never really free. We’ll always be ‘the mom’ (or dad).”

Then I started thinking about how our parenting role keeps changing over time. With the changes getting more dramatic as our kids age. Lately I’ve been freaking out about the fact that very soon I won’t be a “…freelance writing, happily married mom of two teens.” It’s not the “freelance writing, happily married” part, but the changing “mom of two teens” part that’s causing the freak.

I believe I’ve mentioned in the past that my daughter’s birthday is on Christmas Day. My due date back in 1991 was December 16^th, and as it got further and further into December without our unborn child even hinting at a debut, I remember I started praying. “Okay God, please make it any day but Christmas. Any day but Christmas. Any day but Christmas…”

Yeah, well.

If anyone out there doesn’t think God has a sense of humor, I can assure you he was most likely laughing uproariously when he had our little package delivered (Sorry honey, couldn’t resist the pun!) at 10:47 a.m. Christmas morning. I’m sure he was like, “Puh-leeeze! Your names are Chris & Holly! What other day would I have your sweet baby girl arrive!”

But I digress; it’s not her birth story that’s causing me to freak either. It’s the year. Our sweet, baby girl is turning TWENTY!

Two decades.

Four quinquennials.

One-fifth of a Century.

How can I be the parent of a twenty-year old!

Part of the problem is that although in “real life” I’m 49 years old, inside the imaginary world in which I dwell, I’m a super-cool twenty something. My body knows it’s 49 as evidenced by my annoying knee twinges, plantar fasciitis, biceps tendonitis, blah, blah, blah. But in my head I only graduated from college a few years ago.

I’m not the only one who thinks like this, am I?

It’s like, all this stuff keeps happening that logically I should know is going to happen, and yet, always seems to catch me by surprise.

Like when our oldest graduated from high school and went off to college. Or when our youngest began learning to drive.

And now this. In ten days I’ll no longer be a mother of teens. My role is changing. Again.

Sigh.

But time waits for no man, or mom. So I must press on. And in so doing, I come to the truly important part of this post. What am I supposed to do with my bio on here? Since I can no longer refer to myself as a “mom of two teens,” what am I? I don’t even know how to explain myself anymore. The mom of a twenty and teen? A mom of kids who are bigger than I am? Help me out here, people. Any suggestions?

Image by: baileyraeweaver

Two Funerals and a Girls Night

I just attended my second funeral within two weeks. And while I do not park myself in the “bad things happen in threes” camp, it does feel a bit strange to have them happen so close together like this.

Whenever life-altering events like these happen around the holidays, they seem magnified for some reason. Even without dealing with funerals, it’s easy to let ourselves get dragged down by all the inherent stress that typically accompanies this time of year, to let minor speed bumps become massive potholes.

Like letting myself get seriously annoyed at the company that messed up my carefully crafted Christmas card collage. Or raging at the high-tech printer which took longer to spit out my mailing labels than if I'd hand-addressed them myself. Or to grumble over ruined cookie dough.

To sweat the small stuff.

So I’m flipping the switch. I’ve decided my “third thing” is going to be a GOOD thing. Attending these funerals has reminded me how important it is to focus on every good thing in life. That it’s our relationships which really matter. Spending quality and quantity time with the people we love.

…And the people that crack us up with their outrageous antics, shocking behavior and hilarious stories.

That’s right. I’m talking about Girls Night!

This Saturday night, I’m hanging with my Babes. They are some of the brightest lights of my life. And I’m talking the funky, iridescent, twinkling, singing (Nora!) kind. My Babes are technically my Bunco Babes. Although, whenever I mention “It’s Bunco night, baby!” to my hubs, he just rolls his eyes. Because we haven’t actually played Bunco in er…well, a few years. But that’s not the point.

I’m sure it’s a proven scientific fact that women have an actual physical need to talk. When these 12+ women and I get together once a month, it’s less about playing Bunco than it is about sharing, venting, bonding, giggling and laughing uproariously. And baby, I can use some belly laughs right about now. Salve to my soul!

So, if you aren’t already, I encourage you to join me in focusing on the good stuff. During this season of rush here, hurry there… just stop. Breathe. Think of everything you have to be grateful for. Write it all down. And if you don’t already have Babes of your own, get some!

Heart Image by: Sarah DuMay

I’m baaaaccck!

I apologize for falling off the face of the Blogosphere! I was so busy preparing for our family adventure in France, then playing “catch up” once we returned. And then…well, the sunshine beckoned. The pile of books I’ve been wanting to read beckoned. The limited time I had with my college girl at home beckoned. The yard work and neglected-from-the-school-year housework beckoned. And before I knew it, the end of August had arrived!

We took our girl back up to college a little over a week ago. Her new apartment is adorable and I know she’ll have such a fun time during her sophomore year. It was still tough leaving her, but not nearly as difficult as it was last year. Hopefully, I won’t start breaking down while listening to love songs on the radio like I did last August. (Boy, was I a mess!)

I love the break from our routine that summer brings. But now I’m dusting off my computer keyboard, fixing up my neglected website (www.hollybowne.com), and slowly working myself back into my regular writing schedule.

I would love to know how my website’s links--to writing samples I’ve personally uploaded--get all convoluted and messed up when absolutely nothing’s been changed on my end! Fortunately, my biggest fan (Hi Mom! *wave*) noticed things were amiss and let me know. Hopefully everything is linking smoothly now. I feel about operating my website the same way I feel about driving a car. It’s necessary and I have a basic idea of how it all works, but when something goes wrong, I really don’t have the first clue on how to fix it!

I hope everyone is having a lovely summer! (And yes, it’s still officially summer until September  23rd!)

Image by: adihrespati

Sin City Or Family Getaway

My hubby Chris and I journeyed to Las Vegas a few weekends ago for a family function. I’d never been there before and was curious to see what this place--known as everything from “Sin City” to a great family vacation destination—was actually like. We were only there for a weekend, and with all the family fun scheduled, we only had little time to see the city’s sights. But I think we managed to catch a few of the highlights.

When we arrived, we met my uncle for lunch. He’s lived there for 21 years and guided us to some beautiful views…

 …including the Hoover Dam and bridge.

We witnessed the 30-foot tall bronze sculptures known as “Winged Figures of the Republic,” created by Norwegian-born, naturalized American Oskar J.W. Hansen. They guard the plaque commemorating the 96 men who died during the dam’s construction.

On our final night there, we booked a room at The Venetian, which I must say, was the most amazing hotel I’ve ever had the privilege of staying in!

 They even offered gondola rides!

We traversed the Las Vegas Strip—that infamous 4-mile stretch of Las Vegas Boulevard. I was excited to see it, and at first, walking around was pretty cool. We saw loads of fascinating people and interesting things, like Pretend Paris…

 And Pretend Rome…

 I’ve heard the lights of Vegas are so bright that to airplanes flying overhead, they emulate the effect of the rising sun.

I wandered through some exclusive shops and came really close to buying an adorable little, white sundress for a mere $1,950. NOT!!! Seriously, who buys this stuff?!!

Now on the flip side, I must respectfully disagree with anybody who suggests that Las Vegas makes a nice family getaway. We witnessed some pretty sad stuff on The Strip, as well.

First, there were the hot little numbers wearing their super short, super tight little numbers, teetering along the sidewalk and clearly looking for…ahem, a little fun. Chris and I observed many of them the following morning, just returning to the hotel as we were leaving at around 6:00 a.m.

Then there were the “Card Flicker Dudes” (CFD’s), at least that’s what I’m calling them. These were men and women whose only job appeared to be to stuff naked women’s er, business cards into the hands of passersby.

Image from Jimmy Hoofa’s Las Vegas Blog

One of these CFD’s tried to hand a card to my brother-in-law as he was walking beside his 16-year-old daughter, and I actually had a female CF reach across me in an attempt to hand a card to Chris. Don’t worry I used my karate chopping techniques and she backed off instantly.

Image by Memekiller

Neither Chris nor I are gamblers. And I know many people find gambling a fun form of entertainment, but I must confess I don’t get it.

It was a beautiful, warm sunny day, and as we took a shortcut through one casino I found it a little sad to see all the people spending their day propped up on stools in front of machines, eyes glazed and faces reflecting the neon-colored glow of the flashing game screens in front of them.

But you know I like a happy ending, so to finish off this post, I’ll share that some of my favorite movies are the Ocean’s trilogy. (If you haven’t seen them, rent them!) So I was especially excited to see the Bellagio in real life, as well as its beautiful musical fountain—the one that’s depicted at the end of “Ocean’s Eleven.”

Image by Poco a poco

Here’s a short excerpt from the one I watched. They performed My Heart Will Go On by Celine Dion:

Just beautiful!

Hoping For The Worst

I’ve drilled it into my kids’ heads that a lot of people’s personal problems in life often boil down to a lack of confidence and self-esteem. Now I know this isn’t always the case, but negative feelings in these areas can lead to unhealthy relationships, and trouble with alcohol and drugs, to name a few. My hubby and I have worked to encourage attitudes of positive self-worth within our kids, starting all the way back in toddlerhood.

I’m also aware, however, there is a distinct difference between raising a child who has healthy self-esteem, and raising a child who is self-centered, unaware of the needs of others, and filled with a supercilious attitude of entitlement.

The youth minister of our church recently shared a blog post by Reggie Joiner, co-author of the book, Parenting Beyond Your Capacity. I really liked the points Joiner made concerning the topic of children and self-esteem in his recent blog post titled, "How To Raise a Jerk." They reminded me of this Andy Rooney essay I heard about a long time ago regarding letting your children fail, hoping they drive old junker cars and experience difficulties as they grow up. I tried hard to find Rooney’s essay online to include with this post but I experienced an “epic fail,” as my son would say.

Anyhoo… Here are some ideas contained in Joiner’s post that struck a chord with me. Some good advice if you want to successfully raise a jerk:

·        *  Protect them from the consequences of their own mistakes.

·        *   Keep them away from anyone who thinks differently than they do.

·        *  Try to give them everything they want.

·        *  Convince them they are more special than other kids.

·        *  Always take their side when they get in trouble with their teacher or friend at school.

·        *   Don’t give them consistent opportunities to help or serve other people.

·        *  Never require them to do chores.

·        *  Never let them hear you say “I was wrong. I am sorry.”

You can read his entire post HERE.

I think it’s natural to want our children to have an even better childhood experience than we had. Even if we thought ours was great, there’s always room for improvement, right? But how do you balance that desire without raising a jerk? What are your thoughts?

Image by: o5com

Mother’s Day Getaway

In the past, I’ve shared my Mother's Day protests. But this year marks the first time since my boy started playing club soccer that I celebrated Mother’s Day on Mother’s Day and did not spend it on a cold soccer field. Now, he did actually have a game on Mother’s Day as usual, but I—bad mommy that I am—blew it off (*shocked gasp*) and instead celebrated this year by spending an entire Mother’s Day weekend with my sister and my mom! Yeah, baby!

We road-tripped to Holland, Michigan for their annual Tulip Festival!

We started out cruising through the arts & crafts show, then took a tour aboard the Tulip Time Bus. Here’s our knowledgeable tour guide:

We viewed some of Holland’s historical sites and areas of particular beauty, and learned some interesting facts. For example did you know that Holland, Michigan is the second happiest city in the nation?

The only bummer was that because of the cold spring we’ve been having so far, many of the tulips and flowering trees hadn’t bloomed yet. But we still managed to see some beautiful blossoms…

After hitting the festival, we drove to our hotel. We’d booked a spa package at the J.W. Marriott. While I got a massage, my sister had a pedicure and we gave mom a manicure. Side Note: The masseuse told me I was carrying a LOT of tension in my neck and upper back and should really consider having massages a couple of times a week until all the knots are worked out. (Uh…hubs, are you reading this?)

Annnnyhoo…

After our spa treatments, we got all dolled up for an awesome dinner at Holland’s Alpen Rose restaurant. After completing my recent travel writing project on Austria, it was so cool to get to eat real Austrian cuisine made by an Austrian chef from Austria. Like this dish of fresh handmade spaetzle dumplings sautéed with cherrywood smoked bacon, spinach and Swiss cheese. Yum!

After dinner we attended a performance of Cheating Cheaters at the Holland Civic Theatre. It was a cute performance, but I think we were all a little wiped out from our busy day and I noticed mom kept “resting her eyes” during the performance. Ha, ha!

We headed back to the hotel and had a glass of wine in our room. We turned off all the lights to enjoy our lovely view of Grand Rapids’ by night.

After sleeping in and enjoying a delicious Mother’s Day, we road-tripped back home. Thanks mom and sis for a FABULOUS Mother’s Day!

And a Happy Belated Mother’s Day to all the other Moms out there!





All photographs © Holly Bowne with the exception of the following:



DeZwaan Windmill Image by: Becky Anne
Dutch Dancer Images by: Benimoto
Welcome to Holland Image by: Bazooka Joe